Super Mom - I Wish!

I have this vision of how I want things to be. It's a great vision in which I'm in the star, leading roll as the bestest, coolest, most awesome mom and wife ever! It goes like this...

I want to be...

• the mom who always stays calm and collected
• the mom that never loses her patience and screams like a mad woman
• the mom that fixes the healthy snacks and lunches - free of processed foods -- every day
• the mom that keeps the house clean
• the mom that has everything is organized and looking good
• the mom who keeps up with her blogging
• the mom that keeps up with the dishes
• the mom that can keep the garden growing something other than weeds
• the mom that has it all together and remembers to take a shower every day
• the mom that can stick to a healthy eating plan for more than a day and a half
• the mom that stays on top of meal planning and grocery shopping
• the mom that doesn't wear extra large yoga pants all the time
• the mom that doesn't put her hair in a pony tail everyday
• the mom that fits back into her old clothes
• the mom that volunteers for extra stuff
• the mom that isn't grumpy all the time
• the mom that doesn't get stuck on the internet when she should be doing all the above
• the mom that walks and exercises and looks great

What I am...

• the mom that is not calm and collected AT ALL
• the mom that looses it too much and yells
• the mom that decides the "breakfast" and "lunch" at school must be health enough or they wouldn't be able to serve it (yeah right!)
• the mom that can keep one room clean..maybe...for like...an hour
• the mom that isn't organized at all
• the mom who barely writes on her blog at all even though she wants to
• the mom that always seems to have dishes in the sink and a dishwasher to empty
• the mom that can't keep 1 plant alive for more than a week
• the mom that gives in to the junk food and fast food because well...its easier 
• the mom that doesn't plan the meals and do the shopping because the shopping trip today ended with leaving with no groceries...which then led to scream like a mad woman
• the mom that has "dress" sweats which are newer and less faded than the regular yoga pants
• the mom that is grumpy because after fighting about brushing teeth and brushing hair, and talking back, and being sassy, and doing homework, and cleaning your room...it's hard NOT to be grumpy
• the mom that is so tired from the day that all she can manage is surfing the web
• the mom that is so exhausted that nothing gets done after J's bedtime
• the mom that loves her daughter so very much that it breaks my heart that I can't be all the things I want to be for her!

I try to come up with good ways to stay on track...but then get side-tracked so easy. It's frustrating and overwhelming to say the least...but I know I must keep swimming. Just keep swimming. And hope that tomorrow it all falls into place more along the lines of the first list.

I left Jessica's softball game yesterday SOOOO frustrated because they should have won the game. But due to (in my judgmental opinion) some not so good base coaching they lost right at the end. And I had to console my crying daughter and explain to her that she did everything right...but was out just the same. 

And then...I got in the car to drive home and heard more reports of the bombings in Boston and I thought...you know what...the fact that they lost that game doesn't really matter in the big scheme of things. I thought about this family ... who has to let go of their son and had to make decisions about donating organs and how to explain to the little brother why his big brother wasn't coming home this time. And I was so very thankful that I had my sassy, frustrating, mini-me to hug tight and tuck into bed. I'm so very thankful that God has blessed me with Jessica and Chris and that I have the opportunity to be a wife and mom. And I'm reminded that "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" and that I only have to remember to ask. And pray. And ask. And pray. And remember that I can't do it alone. 

So...I'm going to go tuck my baby girl in...and read some bedtime stories...and kiss her good night and tell her how much I love her. And when I wake up tomorrow it will be a new day...and a new chance to tackle a few things on the top list!

Remember...keep praying and keep swimming.